Pictures of Rainbows

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Wednesday, September 7, 2011

Q's without the A's



So many questions unanswered right now.  I just have this feeling that there will never be another sticky BFP for me.  My cycles are becoming more and more messed up and nothing seems to help.  I don't know what else to do about it.  Pray...that's all I can still do...and that's what I am doing.

Have you been here??  The point at which you throw in the towel and say this isn't working?  What was your next step?  Did you look into adoption?  Did you just give up all together?  I honestly don't know what mine will be.  We may have an opportunity for adoption, but no word on that since I last told you about it.  My insurance stopped covering fertility treatments, so any of those we want to pursue now will be out of pocket.  Unlike some, I really don't think we can afford it.  My heart is so broken.  All I want is my precious rainbow to hold in my arms, to bring home, to love, and cherish!!  I didn't think that was asking too much, but apparently God has other plans for me...what I don't know, though.

Currently I am sitting at 16DPO and no sign of AF.  I tested at 11DPO and 13 DPO with BFNs and again today...another BIG FAT NEGATIVE.  I just don't understand what my body is doing.  I hope I get some answers soon, though.

Please feel free to share your experiences with me if you've been here.  I'd appreciate the input!

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