Adoption?

If given the chance to have a private adoption after more than 4 years of trying with more losses than ANYONE should have to go through, would you do it?  There are so many questions going through my mind.  What if they back out at the end?  What if they decide not to do adoption but abort?  Can I handle those things?  Should I use a family name on an adopted child if it gets that far?  There's so much to think about.  This is still very much so in its infancy.  I never thought that I would be able to adopt.  Now that this may be an option, I must admit I'm a little scared to get into the process and get burned.  Even with a contract, it could get ugly if the mom wants to back out.  I'm not sure I can handle the pain of losing another baby.....especially one that was "guaranteed" to me.  

Have any of you ever thought about this?  Have you been through it?  What were your experiences....both good and bad?

It's just so hard to be looking at maybe holding a baby soon, but to not get excited, or get your hopes up, or anything.  I want to be fully prepared if this starts moving forward, but I don't want to be invested in it if it doesn't.  

If you adopted, did you gear up to breastfeed?  It's not impossible to do.  I know I would have to, but I'm not real sure how to go about it.  If you've ever been through that, what was your experience?  I need feedback on this one, ladies!  I'm depending on you to help me decide and maybe get ready.

Well, I'm 10 DPO today.  I don't think this cycle is a hit, but maybe more of a miss.  I wish we could know as soon as conception occurs.  If you've ever seen the movie Wall-E...the robot Eva had a light that came on when she was carrying a sign of life on earth.  A little green light started flashing.  Why couldn't we have something like that??  LOL  It would totally make the TTC journey a lot easier!  Oh well, I guess we will wait and see.